draping ethics in seeking a new massage therapist

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Hi... I have a question for the massage therapists...

I have had massage routinely for 15 years... Occasionally when there is a good relationship between myself and the therapist I will tend to have sessions twice a month. Given concerns about boundaries and appropriate/inappropriate behavior, I completely understand most massage therapists policy on always draping a client. It makes sense. For me, the massage is about trust. In those cases where I've had a regular massage therapist for a prolonged period of time (at least 1 year), the therapist and I have discussed my personal preference not to be draped. I sincerely feel if I can trust a therapist when I am not draped it reduces my anxiety. If and after we have established a trustful relationship and they have learned that I have no inappropriate intentions or actions, some therapists have been felt comfortable with a no-draping approach and some have not. I have continued with good massage therapists regardless of their comfort with my preference. It is simply a preference not a neccessity. Obviously I understand anyone's concerns. Massage therapy is an intimate important encounter in which both parties must trust each other and feel safe. My question is simply this... In looking for a new therapist, how should I approach them in a way that's honest and respectful, given my prefence?

thanks for your feedback and please take the question for what it is... A honest, thoughtful inquiry....
 


Simple, ask them.
I would not comply, sorry.
My clearest of boundaries is draping.
I would not however be offended should you ask...but still, not going there.
Might I ask a question? You stated that after a year you were comfortable enough to bring up draping and how it reduced your anxiety.
About what do you have anxiety regarding your therapeutic relationship of more than a year?

Robyn
 
draping ethics in seeking a new massage therapist

tranemonk said:
In those cases where I've had a regular massage therapist for a prolonged period of time (at least 1 year), the therapist and I have discussed my personal preference not to be draped.>>>>>>>>>>>In looking for a new therapist, how should I approach them in a way that's honest and respectful, given my prefence?
You discuss it the same way you did previously, after they've been your therapist for a prolonged period of time, and you've built up the trust. Why the need to do it differently now?
Searching for a new therapist based on draping style is like searching for a therapist based on what colour sheets they use. You may miss out on finding the right therapist for you, regardless of drape style/colour.
 


Great question :)

I'm with the others on this one; they raise awesome points.

I, too, would never be offended that you asked.
I, too, would not comply.

Personally, I've received many a phone call from prospective male clients who asked about draping almost right off the bat, and ALL of them were looking for Something Else. So, I've joined the many experienced therapists who see that as a yellow (if not red) flag.

Just my 2 cents :)
~Jyoti
 


Although it is a massage therapist's job to be accepting of everyone's body (and this is not difficult to do compassionately) -- this particular request, especially when made for psychological reasons, is beyond our scope of practice. (Actually I'm not really sure whose practice would include a client being naked for the purpose of reducing anxiety.)

It sounds like you know that the professional standard in the US is to drape. Depending on the state the MT works in and the associations s/he belongs to, it may also be a legal standard and/or part of a code of ethics. Rather than searching by asking a therapist to make an exception to professional standards, you might more profitably seek to address this concern with other professionals whose scope of practice includes anxiety reduction.
 


I will never understand the american aversion to naked bodies.

On my intake form, there is an area where you can choose your method of draping. Full drape, towel, or nothing at all. I am not in any way shape or fashion ashamed to work on a naked body, and when i get a massage, i prefer no drape as well. I cannot stand a therapist who spends more than a few minutes constantly adjusting a sheet just so that my junk doesn't show. If you're afraid to see someone's naughty bits, why are you in this profession?

I also prefer to work on people with no draping. I grew up in a house that was not modest, and have worked everyday for years on naked bodies. A penis is a penis. Breasts are simply breasts. After seeing 4+ naked people a day for several years, everyone looks the same, and believe me, it has nothing to do with sex AT ALL.

Of course, I understand some people who say that allowing full nude massage gives people the impression that you are providing something other than a thereuputic massage. However, I make it clear to my clients where my boundaries lie, and if you cross them, the session will be terminated. No questions asked.
 


From another thread....
Spacer said:
I would also suggest she see a different therapist. If she's dead on >>>>>>> when it comes to the massage, and you're not comfortable doing it..then simply don't.
I have no problem telling a client that needs to find a different therapist to do so. If i can't give you what you want and need, then by all means, find someone else who can.
>>>>>> can be substituted with pain/draping/whatever totally agree with the statement, an MT can't be the perfect MT for every client, and there should be no guilt associated with deciding the therapists deciding they're not the perfect MT.
Spacer said:
After seeing 4+ naked people a day for several years, everyone looks the same, and believe me, it has nothing to do with sex AT ALL.
yes, naked body on massage table has absolutely nothing to do with sex for the MT that sees naked bodies all the time. I wish someone could explain that to all the clients that don't see 4+ naked people a day for several years - some of them are a bit confused about touch/naked/sex all being the same thing.
 


melb said:
yes, naked body on massage table has absolutely nothing to do with sex for the MT that sees naked bodies all the time. I wish someone could explain that to all the clients that don't see 4+ naked people a day for several years - some of them are a bit confused about touch/naked/sex all being the same thing.

Initial intake sessions should make that clear, and can be done in a matter as to not offend the client. You simply state your intentions and boundaries and benefits to the client, and chat about processes and goals for the session.

I always take at least 10 minutes to chat with new clients the first time they walk through the door, filling out intake forms and becoming familiar with what they hope to get out of the session.
 


Some things continue to amaze... did a quick search using the word "draping", and there were 130+ topics listed. I'm sure some social/psych. major could do a good thesis on the topic. Combine this with the prevalent body image issues today, and you could make a career out of it.
Most of the female MT has had more than their fair share of trolls, and to a lesser extent we males have had some as well. Hence the need to enforce boundaries. Draping is the logical and simple solution.
Yes North Americans are far more body afraid than Europeans, but far less than many other cultures.
I agree that looking for a therapist based on draping choices is short sighted. If there is a therapeutic need for exposure then there shouldn't be an issue. But that need must be clear and informed, and the benefit real.
I have worked undraped in a clinical and non clinical setting. In clinical it has never been completely undraped... LDM breast work for example. In non clinical I've worked on European clients at a resort, in an outdoor setting... they usually remove their expensive swimwear before getting on the table. Accepting this is a condition of working for this exclusive private resort.
If a client books, is new, and asks for no draping, then sorry its policy. If the client is new, presents with a specific clinical need, then it's discussed, informed, signed off, and then debriefed (no pun intended) and signed off on a post treatment evaluation form, then it's OK, but never totally undraped.
One regular with hyperhydrosis, goes almost nude, but the genitals are always covered. For her full A/C pointed at the table would likely not be enough. She says that she gets partial relief for a day or two after a 1-2hr session. I usually see her once a month or before an important social event.
It may be different here where winters are COLD (-40C) and summer is only hot for about a month. My table warmer is only off for a couple of weeks, and having at least a sheet handy for chills is just good patient care.
I guess this will always be a debated topic, and will continue to come up, but I couldn't resist the "here we go again" feeling.

Darren
 


Yes, Jilith, it is required here by law too. But apparently, there are MTs who dont care what the law is concerning draping in Texas and I am sure other states as well. It is called playing with fire, and those therapists that play with fire take the chance of getting burned.

I sure hope they dont come to this board to complain when they do get burned.
 
Draping and the American view of nudity

Draping is a standard practice for the practice of massage therapy in the US.

As a massage therapist, I drape clients because it is the law and allows me to hold onto my license to practice in a given state.

Personally, I do not have personal views regarding the practice of draping in massage therapy. I do it because it is the law around this way. If a client does not want to be draped, he or she can lay on the table fully clothed and we can massage that way. The clothing can be treated like an extra layer of skin or a continuim of my skin in the same manner a chair massage is done.

If this is not good enough, then the client must seek out another therapist.
 


jillith said:
in my state (texas) draping is required by law. even if it wasn't, i would still drape.

No, it's not. I practice in texas, and i can garauntee you it's not.

As long as you have written consent on your intake form from both the client and the therapist, it is perfectly legal.
 


here is a link to the rules in texas:

http://info.sos.state.tx.us/pls/pub/readtac$ext.TacPage?sl=R&app=9&p_dir=&p_rloc=&p_tloc=&p_ploc=&pg=1&p_tac=&ti=25&pt=1&ch=141&rl=5


Read down to letter h, number 4.


darren said:
guess this will always be a debated topic, and will continue to come up, but I couldn't resist the "here we go again" feeling

I apologize for boosting an older thread, but I rarely lurk outside of the injury/pathology and business forums, and happened upon this one. I am different in my views of the human body than the majority of the posters here, it seems.

Either that, or it seems I don't get as many perverts as a lot of you do.
 


I guess it does clearly state an "unless agreed to." Interesting. Honestly regardless of my own preferences as a client and practitioner, if there are going to be laws written about massage therapy at all (ugh), I do prefer to see laws written in this way - trusting that the clients and practitioners can make decisions, rather than making the list of actionable items longer and longer. (If professional associations make decisions about what members can and can't do, I don't mind that as much.)
 


BJB-LMP:
Basically that's the way it is here in Ontario. The professional associations set the standards, not the legislators. Laws govern what we can do, not how we do it. The laws also govern who can use the designations "Massage Therapist", and "Massage Therapy". It's the professional association CMTO that governs how the "Therapist" operates.

Spacer:
No apology needed... you are enitled to boost. ;)
I don't think it's a matter of different views so much as different focuses for our practice. We have to be careful in our rolls to ethically protect the client, sometimes even from their own choices buy saying no to a situation that has a potentially higher chance of going wrong or being misunderstood.
 


renauddv said:
Some things continue to amaze... did a quick search using the word "draping", and there were 130+ topics listed.
If you did a search for business cards you get over 250+ search results, if you search for cover you get 500+ results, if you search for glutes you get 110+. If you read the draping threads and 80% of them were "I'm horrified anyone would do a massage without draping" it may be worth the major thesis work on the relationship between body image and draping in the thereputic massage environment, but cosidering most of the posts mention draping in relation to how to filter out clients looking for more than a massage during the initial phone call, I don't think the shocking search results relate to body image issues, they relate to hot to deal with the confused portion of the public that think touch and naked means happy endings. In my experience, anyone quizzing about draping repeatedly during the initial phone call gets around to quizzing about what exactly gets massaged during the massage - it's boring, it's not shocking, it's "here we go again, this one's asking about draping" rolls eyes, comments about "I'm not shy", and "it's natural" only add to the "here we go again" feeling for the therapists.

Because of the confused portion of the population that thinks an undraped massage means happy endings, if anyone really just wants an undraped massage and nothing more, don't quizz about draping during the initial phone call, make an appointment with someone and see if you actually like their style of massage regardless of draping used, there is no point pushing the draping issue if you hate the massage, and really if it's a rotten massage would you stick with them because it was an undraped massage????? (make the effort to ignore the time wasted moving draping during the massage - that seems to be a common argument used by people saying they are looking for an undraped massage) Select a massage style like lomi lomi where the draping is minimal compared to other styles, you might find minimal is undraped enough for you none when face down, one hand towel that doesn't get moved at all when face up, rather than something like hot stone where sheets are often placed between the body and the hot placement stones. If the massage is good, make another appointment and if you think it is appropriate then discuss the draping issue before you get on the table. If you can cope with waiting a for a couple of more appointments, all the better, the therapist will be even more comfortable with the fact you are only looking for massage. The original poster said "those cases where I've had a regular massage therapist for a prolonged period of time (at least 1 year), the therapist and I have discussed my personal preference not to be draped." I think that's waiting for the discussion for a bit too long. All I say is don't push the draping issue on the initial phone call, you may not get the first appointment, and blame that on the confused portion of the general public, not on the therapist because they can't deal with a naked body, it's more likely it's a therapist that is soooooo bored with discussions about draping, happy endings, how much extra to massage everything, and what the therapist will be wearing - and that can all happen in the initial phone call if you let it.
 


Mel I wish I were you! Amen sister to every word of it - especially the part where we're not shocked, we're *bored* by these "requests." (And frankly I'm bored hearing a few therapists who think they're more "open" than the rest of us go on about "the American aversion to naked bodies" too, as if draping preference = psychological problem . . . )
 


I believe most of the people who ask this type of question are looking for some desperate therapist who is new to the market and perhaps a bit needy for money.

When I first started my practice, I recieved a few of these calls, but since then, nothing.

Most of the MT's in my area all went to the same school, and the school did an excellent job of informing students how to handle this type of call. So, if someone is calling around to new MT's in my area, they hear the same responce over and over.
 


BJB-LMP said:
Mel I wish I were you! Amen sister to every word of it - especially the part where we're not shocked, we're *bored* by these "requests." (And frankly I'm bored hearing a few therapists who think they're more "open" than the rest of us go on about "the American aversion to naked bodies" too, as if draping preference = psychological problem . . . )



:iagree:
 
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    wonderspa: 🌺welcome to wonder spa☎️416-5000-800,L6a4H8,we have 4young beautiful girls working everyday,Happy Sunday,ensuit shower available 🍅, friendly nice girl Sunny providing deep tissue to relax oil message back walking hot stone and nice body slide,🍅big big boob sexy face Joey is very good looking,open maid,amazing full body massage,really popular,give you warm comfortable time🔥
  35. DareDevil:
    ARIA WELLNESS ♥️♥️ADDRESS: 360 HWY 7, UNIT #6, RICHMOND HILL,647-222-5683 ♥️♥️(PHONES CALL ONLY, NO TEXT'N AVAILABLE) ♥️TODAY'S Schedule!♥️ Loaded lineup with Beautiful Girls : New Pretty Girl Cici, New Sexy Girl Faye, Magical Mia and Work out🏋🚴💪 Babe Amy! BUY 10 HOURS (GET 11 HOURS) 🌹🌹**TODAY'S PICK OF THE DAY IS 🍭🍬CICI🍬🍭**
  36. HolidaySpa:
    Sunday at 🌴😎🌅𝓗𝓸𝓵𝓲𝓭𝓪𝔂 𝓢𝓹𝓪🌅😎🌴3517 Kennedy Rd, Unit 4, Scarborough ☎️𝟰𝟯𝟳-𝟮𝟰𝟳-𝟭𝟭𝟵𝟵☎️: Amy & Fiona. AMY is an attractive young lady with larger breasts and a nice bottom. She has outstanding oral skills, and is very popular. Don’t miss out on her special skills! FIONA is a slim hottie with long dark hair, great melons and ass, and nice services. 🌴😎🌅HOLIDAY SPA🌅😎🌴 3517 Kennedy
  37. AliceSpa:
    SUNDAY at 𝗔𝗟𝗜𝗖𝗘 𝗦𝗣𝗔, 4915 Steeles Ave. E, Scarborough 𝟰𝟭𝟲-𝟮𝟵𝟴-𝟬𝟴𝟵𝟴. Alice spa has 3 beauties to choose from today. Open 10am to 9pm: Super SPINNER SUMMER: is a super petite student, very small and slim, 5’3” & super spinner 90 pounds, All Natural 33B Cups & 33” Spinner Hips, very young looking with her pretty baby face. Great at bbbj dfk cim rim cof. Excellent service and Spinner Bod!
  38. Moneylee:
    All season wellness center : Young girl big boobs beautiful face deep massage Sophia,Young girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament Lala,Young girl big boobs beautiful face deep massage Midi , Young beautiful face sexy body and good deep massage Maggie , Enchanting sexy petite deep massage Sherry,🏠 address: #5-30 Rambler dr Brampton ,Ontario L6W 1E2☎️4376655510
  39. wilson holistic centre:
    new girl works at 💋535 Evans Ave today 💕💕💕☎️☎️416-531-6969☎️☎️
  40. Moneylee:
    Full season wellness center: young girl pretty face nice figure Thai deep massage Anika , Student pretty face nice figure Thai deep massage salon ,Young girl Big breasted saucy naughty Ella, Taiwan girl DD Boobs Thai deep massage lily,Enchanting sexy petite deep massage Mary. 2560 Shepard ave Mississauga unit 1 .☎️4379857899🈵🈵👄👄🦵🦵👅👅
  41. Soul Relax Spa:
    ✨ Looking for a relaxing escape? ✅ Click Here Meet🌸Valentina🌸Hellen🌸NinaCall us today for the best treatment and service experience. Click on our Username and FOLLOW US for updates ! Call now ☎ 289 - 298 - 5662☎️ Your ultimate relaxation awaits! ✨
  42. bnwellness_wilson:
    We have 4 young girls are working today, young pretty Lily 25’s with curve body and sexy Coco and sweet GFE Ella are providing deep tissue massage, pls call 4163985777 book appointment and walk in always welcome,back entrance and parking available, 350 Wilson Ave North York
  43. ForeverWarden:
    Sunday at 🫦❤️🔴🟥♾️𝓕𝓞𝓡𝓔𝓥𝓔𝓡 𝓢𝓟𝓐♾️🟥🔴❤️🫦2190 Warden Ave, Unit 201, Scarborough 𝟰𝟭𝟲-𝟴𝟬𝟬-𝟳𝟴𝟴𝟳: Jennifer, Sophia & Cindy. Jennifer is a tall, slim & pretty Asian babe with natural melons and eraser nipples. She is very open minded. Come and give her a try, and you’ll be sure to come back for more. Sophia is a sweet & pretty Chinese lady with natural B Cups and an awe-inspiring smooth rounded ass.
  44. SugarLoveSpa:
    Sunday at ❤️💙 💜⎝𝗦𝗨𝗚𝗔𝗥 𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘 𝗦𝗣𝗔⎠💖💗💘: ANA, CHRISTINA & JENNY. 1270 Finch Ave W (at Keele St), Unit 18. North York. ANA is a young, short and sweet lady, 5’1 & 105 Lbs, very tight, with a small to medium booty. Ana is a versatile honey who provides great massage, & can accommodate your needs. CHRISTINA is Spanish, C Cups, 5'3", tall & nice curves, very open minded.
  45. Jenny’s Spa:
    🎉🍒JENNY’S SPA🎉🍒 ✅5170 DUNDAS STREET WEST✅ 👌ETOBICOKE ONTARIO M9A 1C4👌 ☎️( 647-893-5196)☎️Call or Text ☎️( 437-888-3759)☎️Call Only (ETOBICOKE) OPEN 10am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY 🔥✅GRAND OPENING💯NEW GIRLS EVERYDAY🔥EXCELLENT MASSAGE + SERVICE QUEENS NOW AVAILABLE AT JENNY’S SPA FOR ALL YOUR MASSAGE AND SPECIAL EXTRA NEEDS🔥💯😘🔥❤️👌 🔥BEAUTIFUL NEW YOUNG ASIAN GIRLS EVERYDAY🔥 💯REAL PICTURES OF ATTENDANTS💯 🔥💋Limited Time Special Promotion🔥💋 ✅💦30 Minutes Nude Massage
  46. Annie Spa:
    🎉🍒ANNIE SPA🎉🍒 ✅7-1001 SANDHURST CIRCLE✅ 👌SCARBOROUGH ON M1V 1Z6👌 ☎️ (647) 891-9688☎️ ☎️ (416) 291-8879☎️ (FINCH & MCCOWAN) OPEN 9:30am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY 🔥✅NEW MANAGEMENT💯NEW GIRLS🔥🔥 🔥GORGEOUS NEW YOUNG ASIAN GIRLS - TODAY’s ROSTER INCLUDES: 🔥 Yumi😘💋A striking new tall gorgeous Korean model with long, flowing reddish-brown hair cascading down her back and a slender, elegant figure that exudes grace and poise. Yumi’s natural confidence and allure, make her approach
  47. luckywellness:
    295 Eglinton Ave E,Unit 7, There are two girls working today, Yoyo and Lala. Lala is the new girl, she is very very young and very very thin, both of them provide very good massage and service
  48. Lulu1980:
    Phoenix Blossom Spa 🌹🌹🌹2 girls 🔥🔥🔥5124 Dundas St W Etobicoke☎️416-817-3366👍 Table Shower Sea Salt Bath Body Scrub😘 Japanese girl Nina ❤️ Natural Big Boobs 38 DD 😘Pink Mini Nipples Hot body slide, super enjoyable😘😘😘😘 very provocative service😘😘😘, professional super Luna deep tissue massage, has therapeutic effect to loosen bones and relieve muscle pressure and will bring you unexpected service effects, she will bring you a little surprise😍😍😍😍❤️You are welcome to make an appoint
  49. Lulu_Villa_Spa:
    Elena Vietnamese Sami is a gorgeous model type Vietnamese Girl Cici Cute Vietnamese Girl Judy Vietnamese Girl Natalie filipina mixed Petite girl ☎️647- 446-0886
  50. DareDevil:
    Blackpink Wellness ♥️♥️90 Marycroft Ave. Unit #2, Vaughan, 🍭🍬ON L4L 5Y1 (647) 395-3188. BEAUTIFUL AND SEXY GIRLS TODAY: 🌹Monica, Julie and Beautiful Tiffany on duty🌹.
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