Review Yo So Big, and more Humour

Albertaman

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Should be posting this in Edmonton forum as there is an active community of hobbyists there, but since the first note came up in a massage session in Calgary, here goes:

What are some of your funniest moments in this hobby?

So here I was in a recent semi-legit massage situation. Third time with the Asian therapist. Good therapeutic massage the first two times, with a pleasant amount of teasing before and after the flip, and a relaxing HJ in the last 15 minutes each time. Second visit advanced to some consensual mutual touching, pleasing. On this third visit, after the flip it got hot and heavy. Her pants and panties are off, my fingers stroke her wetness. Her eyes have an inquiring look above her mask. Hear her ask: Condom? Fortunately, I had one in my jacket pocket. Get off the table and get the condom. No discussion on pricing etc. She holds my cock in her two small hands and whispers the classic line, Yo So Big. I slip the condom on. After some more finger foreplay on her, get her positioned on the edge of the table. And then insert the tip of my cock into her. She gasps. I play gently in her, only with the tip inserting a bit, withdrawing, rocking in and out. She has a happy look in her eyes, mask covering any other expressions. But it alternates with a look of pain each time I thrust the tip into her a bit deeper. Her right arm comes up, and then with her fingers she gestures a measurement, and I hear her say "Two Inches, Please".

I didn't know whether I should laugh or cry, but being a gentleman, I made the best of it. Keeping the rest of the session limited to rocking thrusts no deeper than 2" certainty prolonged the activity, and I sensed that due to her 'tight condition', anything deeper could indeed be unpleasant for her. All in all it turned out ok, and she moaned and quivered throughout. I just haven't decided if I will repeat or not. TWO INCHES Please.
To her credit, she did not ask for any specific tip, leaving that to me. Certainly one of the funniest experiences in years. And a novel one for sure.

Share your funny experiences.



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I had a similar experience with a very tight Chinese lady about two years ago, two inches deep and two inches wide was her limits. Will not repeat - took all my efforts to get the head through the gate - kinda like reverse childbirthโ€ฆ..
 
I donโ€™t have any FS experiences as I donโ€™t partake. I have had one woman talk about the โ€œbabyโ€ when giving a HJ. Kinda strange dirty talk that didnโ€™t do much for me. Lol And another woman say I was superman while cleaning up due to the volume. I told her that there was more than what came out. She kept going on me and I showed her a second release about 3 minutes later. The next time I went to see her she asked how super โ€œsupermanโ€ was that day, so I showed her that I could go 4 times in an hour, no massage, just HJ for an hour. Funny thing was, she only wanted the regular fee and standard tip. That reminds me, I should go see her again soon. Lol


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I donโ€™t have any FS experiences as I donโ€™t partake. I have had one woman talk about the โ€œbabyโ€ when giving a HJ. Kinda strange dirty talk that didnโ€™t do much for me. Lol And another woman say I was superman while cleaning up due to the volume. I told her that there was more than what came out. She kept going on me and I showed her a second release about 3 minutes later. The next time I went to see her she asked how super โ€œsupermanโ€ was that day, so I showed her that I could go 4 times in an hour, no massage, just HJ for an hour. Funny thing was, she only wanted the regular fee and standard tip. That reminds me, I should go see her again soon. Lol


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Umm, more contact details if you can please!
 
I donโ€™t have any FS experiences as I donโ€™t partake. I have had one woman talk about the โ€œbabyโ€ when giving a HJ. Kinda strange dirty talk that didnโ€™t do much for me. Lol And another woman say I was superman while cleaning up due to the volume. I told her that there was more than what came out. She kept going on me and I showed her a second release about 3 minutes later. The next time I went to see her she asked how super โ€œsupermanโ€ was that day, so I showed her that I could go 4 times in an hour, no massage, just HJ for an hour. Funny thing was, she only wanted the regular fee and standard tip. That reminds me, I should go see her again soon. Lol


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that's a great one. Probably somewhat of a break from giving deep massages that require a lot of effort. Long time ago, used to have a Russian therapist who used to break up a 90 minute massage into three periods, each ending with a SOG. Never asked her if she was a hockey fan.


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that's a great one. Probably somewhat of a break from giving deep massages that require a lot of effort. Long time ago, used to have a Russian therapist who used to break up a 90 minute massage into three periods, each ending with a SOG. Never asked her if she was a hockey fan.


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Gives a new meaning to โ€œpulling the goalie!โ€
 
It would be really difficult not to go past the 2 inch limit !! Must have taken a lot of concentration on your part.
I would be wanting to giver her the whole 3 inches !!! Lol.
 
It would be really difficult not to go past the 2 inch limit !! Must have taken a lot of concentration on your part.
I would be wanting to giver her the whole 3 inches !!! Lol.

It took all of my early life training as a Buddhist monk to remain within the requested space. The greatest liberation of body, mind, and soul occurs during confinement. Decided, I will visit again.


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I had a similar experience with a very tight Chinese lady about two years ago, two inches deep and two inches wide was her limits. Will not repeat - took all my efforts to get the head through the gate - kinda like reverse childbirthโ€ฆ..

A lot of Chinese massage girls are great actresses. Great lines like :โ€ oh - youโ€™re so big!โ€œ
โ€˜โ€œi never do this before โ€œ.
โ€œyou are too big - just go in a littleโ€.
โ€œOh baby, you making me come โ€œ.
โ€œ i only do this for you โ€œ
โ€this is the first time i do this !โ€
etc.
 
A lot of Chinese massage girls are great actresses. Great lines like :โ€ oh - youโ€™re so big!โ€œ
โ€˜โ€œi never do this before โ€œ.
โ€œyou are too big - just go in a littleโ€.
โ€œOh baby, you making me come โ€œ.
โ€œ i only do this for you โ€œ
โ€this is the first time i do this !โ€
etc.

The familiar lines are exactly that. Part of the act. You missed... You So Thick

But don't forget, we are all getting older. Hormonal shifts. Greater challenges for some ladies. Best to be respectful.


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100% agree with get getting older and respect comment, starting to take all night to do what I used to be able to do all night.
 
A lot of Chinese massage girls are great actresses. Great lines like :โ€ oh - youโ€™re so big!โ€œ
โ€˜โ€œi never do this before โ€œ.
โ€œyou are too big - just go in a littleโ€.
โ€œOh baby, you making me come โ€œ.
โ€œ i only do this for you โ€œ
โ€this is the first time i do this !โ€
etc.

They BEST part is , Most guys believe them :lol
 
They BEST part is , Most guys believe them :lol

Let's face the facts. The illusion is part of the experience. Focused attention, and temporary suspension of reality. The mini vacation. False is real, Real is false. If it were to be just about massage, most people would invest in a high end massage chair, and be done with it. And also, if you happened to turn into a fly, and remained in the room with your favourite semi-legit therapist for an entire 12 hour work day, I bet you would never be seeing her again. We all repeat because we buy into some of the lies, the illusion. Fake is Real. Real is Fake. The Real, Real is pretty Ugly.


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I donโ€™t have any FS experiences as I donโ€™t partake. I have had one woman talk about the โ€œbabyโ€ when giving a HJ. Kinda strange dirty talk that didnโ€™t do much for me. Lol And another woman say I was superman while cleaning up due to the volume. I told her that there was more than what came out. She kept going on me and I showed her a second release about 3 minutes later. The next time I went to see her she asked how super โ€œsupermanโ€ was that day, so I showed her that I could go 4 times in an hour, no massage, just HJ for an hour. Funny thing was, she only wanted the regular fee and standard tip. That reminds me, I should go see her again soon. Lol


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Can we get contact info for the lady that did 4 times?
 
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  39. wilson holistic centre:
    ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•Beautiful Korean girl working at 382 Wilson Ave ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•โ˜Ž๏ธโ˜Ž๏ธ416-840-0071โค๏ธโค๏ธ
  40. AliceSpa:
    SATURDAY at ๐—”๐—Ÿ๐—œ๐—–๐—˜ ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”, 4915 Steeles Ave. E, Scarborough ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿฒ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿต๐Ÿด-๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿด๐Ÿต๐Ÿด. 4915 Steeles Ave. E, Scarborough 416-298-0898 [/color] Alice spa has 4 attractive honeys today. Open 10am to 9pm: CLAUDIA: is Viernamese, young, petite 5'2" & 96 Lbs, B Cup, best rim deep bbbj cim. $40 Room Fee + $80 (incl bbbj & fs). +$20 for rim/cim. Excellent open minded services. SHERRY (12pm-9pm): is tall
  41. ForeverWarden:
    Saturday at ๐Ÿซฆโค๏ธ๐Ÿ”ด๐ŸŸฅโ™พ๏ธ๐“•๐“ž๐“ก๐“”๐“ฅ๐“”๐“ก ๐“ข๐“Ÿ๐“โ™พ๏ธ๐ŸŸฅ๐Ÿ”ดโค๏ธ๐Ÿซฆ 2190 Warden Ave, Unit 201, Scarborough ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿฒ-๐Ÿด๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿฌ-๐Ÿณ๐Ÿด๐Ÿด๐Ÿณ: Gigi, Sara & Tracy. Gigi is slim and young, with long hair, very skinny, good massage. Sara is young & slim with nice C Cups, trim waist, sexy bum and long hair. She is vary friendly uses her assets well. Tracy is an incredibly cute & pretty Japanese/Taiwanese mixed spinner
  42. HolidaySpa:
    Saturday at ๐ŸŒด๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒ…๐“—๐“ธ๐“ต๐“ฒ๐“ญ๐“ช๐”‚ ๐“ข๐“น๐“ช๐ŸŒ…๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒด3517 Kennedy Rd, Unit 4, Scarborough โ˜Ž๏ธ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿญ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿต๐Ÿตโ˜Ž๏ธ: AMY & MAGGIE. AMY is an attractive young lady with larger breasts and a nice bottom. She has outstanding oral skills, and is very popular. Donโ€™t miss out on her special skills! Maggie is sweet, slim and very talented. ๐ŸŒด๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒ…HOLIDAY SPA๐ŸŒ…๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒด 3517 Kennedy Rd, Unit 4 (Kennedy Rd & Steeles Ave E)
  43. bnwellness_wilson:
    We have 4 young girls are working today, young sweet kitty 26โ€™s slime open mind and young flirty Michelle 26โ€™s with sexy body open mind,young sexy flirt Yoyo 36DD with curve body open mind 30โ€™s and Cute GFE Lina are providing deep tissue massage, pls call 4163985777 book appointment and walk in always welcome,back entrance and parking available, 350 Wilson Ave North York
  44. Jennyโ€™s Spa:
    ๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’JENNYโ€™S SPA๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ โœ…5170 DUNDAS STREET WESTโœ… ๐Ÿ‘ŒETOBICOKE ONTARIO M9A 1C4๐Ÿ‘Œ โ˜Ž๏ธ( 647-893-5196)โ˜Ž๏ธCall or Text โ˜Ž๏ธ( 437-888-3759)โ˜Ž๏ธCall Only (ETOBICOKE) OPEN 10am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY ๐Ÿ”ฅโœ…GRAND OPENING๐Ÿ’ฏNEW GIRLS EVERYDAY๐Ÿ”ฅEXCELLENT MASSAGE + SERVICE QUEENS NOW AVAILABLE AT JENNYโ€™S SPA FOR ALL YOUR MASSAGE AND SPECIAL EXTRA NEEDS๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ”ฅโค๏ธ๐Ÿ‘Œ ๐Ÿ”ฅBEAUTIFUL NEW YOUNG ASIAN GIRLS EVERYDAY๐Ÿ”ฅ ๐Ÿ’ฏREAL PICTURES OF ATTENDANTS๐Ÿ’ฏ ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’‹Limited Time Special Promotion๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’‹ โœ…๐Ÿ’ฆ30 Minutes Nude Massage
  45. Lilyspa1:
    Lily Spa : โค๏ธโค๏ธ SuSu ( Asian )Slim , ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜Porn Service ๐Ÿฉท๐ŸฉทElena 22, Latino French, 36 DDD and ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘ASS, ๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ’‹Vicky 22, Philippine mixed White , very open-Minded , ๐Ÿ˜ˆbbbj , DFk ๐Ÿ”ฅDuo ๐Ÿ”ฅ,โ˜Ž๏ธ 6475318288
  46. luckywellness:
    Lucky Wellness Center 4379721888 295 Eglinton Ave E,Unit 7,Mississauga We have two girls serving today. Suki and water, they are both young, pretty, cute and good at massage.
  47. Annie Spa:
    ๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ANNIE SPA๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ โœ…7-1001 SANDHURST CIRCLEโœ… ๐Ÿ‘ŒSCARBOROUGH ON M1V 1Z6๐Ÿ‘Œ โ˜Ž๏ธ (647) 891-9688โ˜Ž๏ธ โ˜Ž๏ธ (416) 291-8879โ˜Ž๏ธ (FINCH & MCCOWAN) OPEN 9:30am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY ๐Ÿ”ฅโœ…NEW MANAGEMENT๐Ÿ’ฏNEW GIRLS๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ ๐Ÿ”ฅGORGEOUS NEW YOUNG ASIAN GIRLS - TODAYโ€™s ROSTER INCLUDES: ๐Ÿ”ฅ Judy๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ”ฅOur new Asian massage girl Judy is a vision of refined sensuality, with a graceful figure and smooth, flawless skin that radiates warmth and allure. Her striking black hair frames her delicate features, and her poised
  48. Lulu1980:
    Phoenix Blossom Spa ๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน3 girls ๐Ÿ˜˜Table shower ใ€body scrub ใ€ Sea salt bath๐Ÿ‘5124 Dundas St W Etobicokeโ˜Ž๏ธ416-817-3366๐Ÿ‘ Young girl Cherry (Student)๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜โ€œcharming breasts.โ€beautiful curvy hips.โ€very provocative service๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜, professional super Suki sexy body beautiful boots 36D deep tissue massage, has therapeutic effect to loosen bones and relieve muscle pressure and will bring you unexpected service effects, she will bring you a little surprise๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜โค๏ธ You are welcome to make an appointme
  49. Lulu_Villa_Spa:
    Mia new Vietnamese sweetheart girl with amazing personality Suki From Taiwan, sweet girl Barbie Petite Korea Part time School girl Elena Vietnamese sweetheart girl Cici Cute Vietnamese girl โ˜Ž๏ธ647- 446-0886
  50. DareDevil:
    Blackpink Wellness โ™ฅ๏ธโ™ฅ๏ธ90 Marycroft Ave. Unit #2, Vaughan, ๐Ÿญ๐ŸฌON L4L 5Y1 (647) 395-3188. BEAUTIFUL AND SEXY GIRLS TODAY: ๐ŸŒนSuperstar Lisa, RMT Rose and Beautiful Tiffany on duty๐ŸŒน.
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